Kids are great, but when the person you are dating has children, they can either be a road block in your relationship or an added pleasure. It will be up to you to see how that turns out. Remember that he and his children have had an ongoing connection before you entered the picture. Don’t do anything major to ruin that or you could find yourself alone, without him or them.
10. Respect his parenting schedule. If he sees his children on a set number of days per week/month, don’t interfere with that schedule. You should be impressed that he wants to be a good dad and part of that means seeing his children and doing things with them. Realize that yes, that will take some time away from you, but support his effort to see them on a regular basis.
9. Prepare yourself for the fact that he may have to change plans with you if his children are sick or in the hospital. Be understanding when this happens, not annoyed. He will appreciate your support.
8. Realize that there could be some fallout from the children’s mother when you enter the picture. Try to deal with it with finesse and dignity.
7. Early on in your dating relationship, don’t insist that you be involved in his activities with the children. Give him the time and space he needs to be with them.
6. Accept the fact that there will be times when he will want to be with them during the time you usually spend together. When they have school activities, sporting events, etc., let those things take precedence.
5. Don’t insist on meeting the children too soon. Wait until the relationship gets serious and you can see a future with this person. Plus, getting to know the kids too soon will only confuse them.
4. Don’t interfere when the person you are dating needs to go to the children’s school for Parent’s Night, etc. If you are only “casually dating”, it’s not your place to attend those types of events.
3. Don’t demand that you attend family parties. Wait until you are in a serious relationship for that. There will plenty of parties and plenty of time for those things later on. Anyway, do you really want to explain your relationship to all his relatives who ask? (and they will)
2. Offer to make dinner a few nights a week. He will be busy with work, seeing the kids, etc., so a home cooked meal will be greatly appreciated.
1. When you are ready to take the next step in your relationship, that’s the time to meet the kids and the other family members. Continue to be supportive of his other commitments, but save time for the two of you as well.
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