Be patient. Surveys show more than 40 million Americans use online dating services. When you factor in all your desired preferences, that’s anywhere from several hundred to several thousand potential matches. It takes time to look at all those profiles. Even when you pique someone’s interest, they still tend read and reread your profile several times before deciding if they indeed want to contact you and what to say to get your interest. You’re looking for love. Not ordering a pizza. Don’t expect desired results in 30 minutes or less. It may take a few months, so hang in there.
Include open ended questions about your interests in your dating profile. For example, if you like action movies or traveling, ask “What’s your favorite chase scene?” or “What is your dream vacation destination?” Also throw in an off-the-wall question of two like “If you had a pet unicorn, what would you name it?” This takes the pressure off the person contacting you to come up with something to say as an introduction while breaking up the monotony of “I” and “me” statements that tend to dominate profiles. It also makes the initial messages between the two of you more comfortable.
Be active, but be selective. Shyness is a big reason why many people choose online dating. They feel uncomfortable getting to initially know someone in a public setting. That awkwardness greatly decreases when breaking the ice from the safety of your computer or mobile device, but you can’t always wait for others to come to you. Even if it’s just saying “hi”, don’t be afraid to be the initiator. That being said, it’s best to only reach out to the people who spark your interest. Contacting daters just because you’ve been in a rut of receiving no messages can backfire.
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